petite anglaise

May 24, 2007


Filed under: good time girl, miam — petiteanglaiseparis @ 11:39 am

Do you blog? Are you in Paris on Saturday 9 June? Do we look like the sort of people you would like to spend quality time with?

Details here, including email for signing yourselves up…

May 18, 2007

save a prayer

Filed under: good time girl — petiteanglaiseparis @ 5:37 pm

I have two simultaneous conversations on gmail chat (also known as a three-way) with my two favouritest and best gay friends. The only background information you need to know is that we had lunch at the Trésor prior to one of my recent dates.

zemickelino to me:   rhino and I said a little prayer for you at Notre Dame des Médailles Miraculeuses after we left you yesterday

me to zemickelino:   wha?!?!

me to rhino:   you *didn’t* really say a prayer for my punani in church yesterday? I’m sure Mickelino is winding me up…

rhino to me:   of course we did! It was the Church of Miracles. bit spooky actually

me to rhino:   you are officially on pre-date praying duty from now on ;-)

zemickelino to me:   did he have nice fesses?

What would I do without these guys?

May 14, 2007


Filed under: good time girl — petiteanglaiseparis @ 9:22 am

I knock at the door. Mr Frog answers, wearing his bathrobe. There is no sign of Tadpole, and I raise my eyebrows and look around with a bewildered expression. I have yet to partake of that important first cup of coffee of the day, so verbal minimalism is de rigueur.

Mr Frog leads me into his bedroom, where Tadpole is prostrate on her bed, wearing pyjamas and an extremely wide smile.

“She’s still in bed?” I shriek, “but we have to be at school in twenty minutes! It’s the thing where they are running in the park today, the thing I’m supposed to be supervising.” The thing which seemed like oh such a good idea when I signed up, but coming as it did after a bumper celebratory drinksfest (with some of the nicest people you could ever hope to meet in honour of Anna’s birthday) I was considerably less enthusiastic when it involved me hauling my sorry carcass out of bed at 7.15 this morning.

Mr Frog smiles and shrugs in that very expressive French way he has; one twitch of his shoulders worth a couple of dozen words: well, you know, she’s tired, look at her, she doesn’t really want to get up, and anyway it’s not my problem because you’re the one taking her to school anyway, he he…

Meanwhile. I. Pace.

“What’s got into you today anyway?” says Mr Frog. “You’re making me dizzy. Look at the state of you. Did you stay out last night or something?” I feel the colour rising to my cheeks.

“What? No! Même pas!

“So what was that thing on your gmail chat status about a date?”

Note to self: must stop being so informative on gmail chat. The whole world may not need to know that I have just picked out all of the chocolate flakes from a box of Nestlé Fitness breakfast cereal, or even (on a more cryptic note) that I have all my bases “uncovered”. And if they do, I should probably do this on twitter, which Mr Frog hasn’t heard of yet.

“Ah, so, um, you saw that, did you? Yes, well. I might have had a drink or two. A very nice drink or two. That’s all.”

Mr Frog smiles a knowing smile. “Well, good for you.”

When I get to school, the running thing is cancelled due to filming in the park. I try not to look too crestfallen at the idea of being able to go back home to bed.

May 10, 2007


Filed under: good time girl, Tadpole rearing, Tadpole says — petiteanglaiseparis @ 8:56 am

This post is dedicated to Uncle Norman, author of this rather sparsely punctuated comment on my last “post”: “Stick to writing about your kid and being shagged in work time leave real life to the grown ups.”

So, I’ve written about my daughter, which is a start, and just leaves his second request. Anyone fancy distracting me from my deadline today? Conveniently, I’m working on my bed at the moment (although one end is currently propped up with Le Petit Robert.) So?

Tadpole’s latest obsession is with Lauren Child’s Charlie and Lola.

After the prolonged agony of her Dora the Explorer phase, hearing Tadpole trying to mimic characters with proper English accents comes as a profound relief. And there is something about the way Lola is drawn, with unruly hair falling across mischievous eyes, which reminds me of Tadpole.

The books have names like “I am not Sleepy and I will not go to Bed” or “I am absolutely too small to go to School” or “My Wobbly Tooth must not Ever Never Fall Out”, and cleverly deal with a lot of the issues toddlers have, like having their hair cut (Princess No Knots) and eating vegetables (which seem to go down a whole lot better when you say they are from Jupiter).

If I might put in a couple of requests though, Lauren, would you consider writing “I will not Ever Never wear trousers to school” or “I am absolutely too small to do my poo poos in the toilet”?

Our latest game is to speak in the style of Charlie and Lola – I am, of course, always cast in the role of Charlie – her sensible but wily older brother – and usually end up saying “but Lola!” rather a lot.

Yesterday Tadpole came out with the following gem, which still has me sniggering this morning:

“I am absolutely ever never good. And sometimes I am naughty”

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