petite anglaise

June 7, 2005

moving out

Filed under: navel gazing — petiteanglaiseparis @ 3:38 pm

Soon, I will have a bed, but no mattress. Cable TV, without a television set. I am rather pathetically relieved, with hindsight, that the computer is mine, all mine. As is the stereo. And the bookcase.

Oddly, the only item we have almost come to blows about so far is the exercise bike. The exercise bike which I rarely use, and which Mr Frog has never used, not even once. It serves mostly as a rather oversized thermometer and as the guardian of the evil ironing pile (until said pile becomes so large that the clothes topple off). I’m not sure who will wrestle custody of the cursed contraption yet, as Mr Frog changes his mind every other day, but I rather think I’d prefer to see it go. At least then it wouldn’t sit in the corner of my bedroom, eying me balefully and making snide comments about my thighs when it thinks I’m not listening.

There will be gaps, where pieces of furniture once stood. I suspect that the flat is going to seem too big, for a while. Especially on the nights when Tadpole will stay over at daddy’s place.

Which of my two sofas will I lie on, I wonder? Which side of the double bed will I favour?

Mr Frog has found a new place to live and will be moving out in ten day’s time. His bachelor pad is 200 m from our/my front door, just across the road, and has panoramic views of Paris, apparently. He jokes that he will be watching me with binoculars from his balcony. I love the way he still has the power (and the inclination) to see the funny side, and to want to make me laugh.

For Tadpole, I think the fact of daddy being close at hand will be helpful. She’ll accompany him to the same baker’s shop, and the same supermarket (where the checkout lady always gives her a kiss), and he’ll still be able to take her to the childminder’s house, some mornings. Business as usual. Anything that can lessen the inevitable impact on Tadpole’s routine has to be good, I feel.

It is also comforting for me to know that if I am struck down my a blinding migraine attack and can’t cope alone, or there is some sort of emergency, Mr Frog will only be a couple of minutes away. But I know I can’t expect him to be ‘on call’ either. I have made my bed, and will have to lie in it.

Which will be rather uncomfortable, until I get this mattress problem sorted out.


  1. however much you feel you made your own bed and all that it is still sad when things like this happen, poeple move out and there is that empty space left behind. My ex moved out of our flat when we split and although I loved having my own space (we had no child), it felt empty and odd.
    I think you’re right about maintaining things somewhat for Tadpole though, and I think you’ll appreciate having Mr F close by as much as she will. and he. good luck…

    Comment by trine — June 7, 2005 @ 4:22 pm

  2. When you do get the mattress, you ought to follow the advice of Erica Berry in “Something’s Gotta Give”: sleep in the middle.

    Comment by R J Keefe — June 7, 2005 @ 4:23 pm

  3. You may be best off sleeping on one of your two sofas until you get that new mattress, killing two birds with one stone.

    best of luck

    Comment by Andrew at St Germain en Laye — June 7, 2005 @ 4:29 pm

  4. I suspect you will fall to sleeping in the middle of the bed and filing the holes in your apt will happen on their own. It sounds like you’re taking a very realistic stance on these new developments in your life. This is going to be a very exciting time in your life. And I would chuck the bike and take the stairs from now on. :)

    Comment by Flare — June 7, 2005 @ 8:30 pm

  5. I think I’m focussing on the little things, because some of the bigger issues are just too upsetting. But, whatever works!

    Comment by petite — June 7, 2005 @ 8:46 pm

  6. stop talking about your thighs. I’ve seen those thighs… and the ass too… you’re worrying over nothing. And all this hawking on won’t get anyone to fantasize about the splendid pseudo-divorcee you now are. Like I just said to Schuey, Offence, not defence. After all, it is practically summer.

    Comment by nardac — June 7, 2005 @ 8:52 pm

  7. I disagree with Flare, I think you’re more the sleeping-diagonal-taking-up-all-usable-space type. And as for the little ‘gaps where furniture once stood’, all the more reason for an Ikea mission! Nothing soothes MY weary nerves better than spending money.

    Thanks for stopping by my site, petite, and, no sweat. I actually had figured what with ‘more important’ things at hand, that a meme might be the last thing on your mind, which I could understand. I don’t really like the things much either, (though I shamefully admit to having resorted to one or two in in my sometimes robotic lack of creativity) but some kind of hunch told me that one coming from ‘THE petite anglaise’ *wink* would be a bit different. In the good way.

    As for your reading of licketysplit, I have to admit to feeling a bit intimmidated, vulnerable. But thank you in advance for being so ‘thorough’.

    Comment by sammy — June 7, 2005 @ 10:52 pm

  8. I’m not sure that having her father living close to her is such a good thing for the little tadpole. It would if she was 14. When you come to think about it, she’s gonna be confused, having her mum and dad living really close to each other but not together. Especially if you think she will for sure try to bring her dad to her mum’s house and vice-versa. Sometimes the fact that the separation is more obvious is a better thing. On the other hand, it’s more convenient for everyone like that. This is a very difficult situation. I admire you for facing it so calmly and with so much phlegm

    Comment by shellorz — June 7, 2005 @ 11:39 pm

  9. Phlegm?

    Comment by prawn cocktail crisps — June 8, 2005 @ 12:38 am

  10. Shellorz, good one, love it, I love seeing words used with their correct and / or alternate meanings – especially when it confuses people :) [mean I know … but I’m also happy to be told the correct meaning myself!]. Phlegm, aside from the obvious ooky meaning, also means coolness of character, not easily agitated, impassive …. possibly not how Petite is feeling, but maybe how she is sounding :)

    Comment by Miss Lisa — June 8, 2005 @ 1:34 am

  11. Making 2 piles of belongings is such a metaphore of 2 people’s lives when they split up, going 2 different directions. The ones belonging to both either have to be fiercely fought for, let go or broken into 2 halves which again is pretty similar to the feelings or souvenirs of one’s relationship isn’t it?
    Just reminding me of bad moments…

    Comment by Maurine au bout du monde — June 8, 2005 @ 2:32 am

  12. (Tongue firmly in cheek)

    In the iPod age, when a couple parts, do they split the .mp3 collection – like they would the vinyl collection in my youth?

    Comment by GriffMG — June 8, 2005 @ 8:28 am

  13. Strange how I discovered your blog last winter during my last big questions before my decision to split in Feb 2005 after 20 years and 2 kids. I just comeback on this page for another visit and I just read that similar thing happening here, with similar questions to be answered. La vie est étrange, des fois. Good luck, never easy, but the future is always better. :)

    Comment by Jean François Porchez — June 8, 2005 @ 9:15 am

  14. GriffMG – no, no my dear – you betray your age – they just copy each others mp3s or download something they prefer…!

    Comment by Mavis — June 8, 2005 @ 10:10 am

  15. I have been instructed to burn copies of all our photos and music onto CD’s actually. The actual paper photo albums are going to be a bit more problematic…

    Comment by petite — June 8, 2005 @ 11:30 am

  16. is anyone having problems commenting by the way? Witho is, so I thought I’d better check.

    email to petite.anglaise @ if you are.

    NB you need javascript and cookies enabled to post a comment.

    Comment by petite — June 8, 2005 @ 11:56 am

  17. Unfortunate use of the word “burn”, petite… could be misunderstood!

    With BF and I, we have separate iTunes libraries (separate “sign-ons” on the PC and therefore separate “My Music” folders) and not much of his music would be welcome in my library anyway ;)

    Comment by witho — June 8, 2005 @ 12:24 pm

  18. Very moving.

    You both seem to be handling all this really calmly and sensibly, which is going to have such positive effects on Tadpole, in ways you will never know.

    Comment by Clare — June 8, 2005 @ 1:09 pm

  19. Glad there’s progress.

    Comment by Zinnia Cyclamen — June 8, 2005 @ 1:11 pm

  20. Tuesdays have come and gone and we are still no further forward in knowing about the new man (it’s probably a man). I don’t want to be pushy but my wife and I are going on holiday next week, and I wanted to be sure it wasn’t me.

    Comment by laurence — June 8, 2005 @ 1:42 pm

  21. well, Laurence, given that Mr Frog reads the site from time to time I thought I ought to censor myself on that, my favourite subject, until such a time as I feel it is no longer disrespectful to him to talk of such (lovely) things.

    I don’t know when that will be, but you’ll just have to keep visiting…

    Comment by petite — June 8, 2005 @ 5:05 pm

  22. Ahhh, she teases us ;)

    Comment by witho — June 8, 2005 @ 10:29 pm

  23. So, I can comment from home, must be my work settings…

    Comment by witho — June 8, 2005 @ 10:29 pm

  24. I hope that Mr. Frog’s new place has a bedroom/room for when Tadpole sleeps over. Which of tadpole’s belongings will go to Mr. Frog’s new place? (so Tadpole will feel at home when she is at his place.)
    You may find you will fight more over Tadpole’s belongings and visiting schedule then over your combined belongings.

    Comment by Iowa — June 9, 2005 @ 12:23 am

  25. You know what Petite ? Nardac is right, as every crazy oups sensible girl is…
    And I think that a few people might have discovered that you are a techno geek. :)

    Comment by schuey — June 9, 2005 @ 1:37 am

  26. Hey! You know what this post means? You get to change your description on the top left.

    “paris has been home to Petite for almost a decade, where she lives in her half-empty flat, walking around in her knickers, and flashing half of the city.”

    Change it now! Slacker.

    Comment by nardac — June 9, 2005 @ 6:54 am

  27. well Nardac,
    it’s interesting you should mention the description as rumour has it on our cirle that petite anglaise is, in reality, an overweight midwesterner of around 50, surfing through the fantasy parallel universe of his own making and -erm – “taking pleasure” shall we say.
    Am I close to the truth, petite?

    Comment by Flighty — June 9, 2005 @ 10:41 am

  28. I do plan to change the description, when Mr Frog actually moves. Not before. That would be wrong.

    But I might start flashing my knickers, in the meantime. The guy opposite who has a camera set up on a tripod in the window will be very grateful, I’m sure.

    Flighty – I am not a Bizgirl-a-like. No. Nardac and Schuey and Coquette and Negrito and countless others can testify to that.

    Comment by petite — June 9, 2005 @ 10:42 am

  29. Have they seen you Petite? In fact, has Nardac been flashed said knickers and thus been compelled to make your descrition more truthful?
    PS am relieved that you are not a fat old man

    Comment by Flighty — June 9, 2005 @ 11:25 am

  30. Why all this talk of knickers? Put a stop to it at once. Please. ;-)

    Comment by Germain — June 9, 2005 @ 12:25 pm

  31. I can’t see your knickers from here.

    Comment by Parkin Pig — June 9, 2005 @ 12:54 pm

  32. All this talk of people “meeting” petite anglaise, you should all know it’s a frightful hoax, as “she” recruits in FUSAC for EMT, blonde, petite, francophone impersonators to attend blogmeets on “her” behalf…

    Comment by EasyJetsetter — June 9, 2005 @ 3:51 pm

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