Whenever the Tadpole is around I can’t seem to stop myself from providing a running commentary about what we are doing. I don’t know whether all mothers do it, but it comes naturally to me. The Frog would say that nothing has changed as I always have talked far too much; he has been known to beg me to stop on the grounds that his head is ‘full’. I blame the parents for taking me to Ireland and dangling me off the top of a tower upside down by my ankles to kiss the Blarney Stone.
When I was on maternity leave last year and feeling a bit cut off from the world, the one-way conversations with baby Tadpole probably began because I was feeling lonely and missing adult conversation. Tadpole seemed to like the sound of my voice, even if it was the slightly irritating, condescending voice I can’t help adopting when I talk to children. Nowadays the running commentary is supposed to be educational: encouraging her to repeat new words and exposing her to as much spoken English as possible.
The following ‘conversation’ took place while pushing the Tadpole through the park. I was rather out of breath as the journey is uphill and Tadpole + pushchair = 20kg.
Petite, wheezing and panting: ‘Ooh look at the doggy! What does the doggy say? Can you see the doggy? Over there! No, not that way! That’s a crow not a doggy!’
Tadpole, eventually: ‘woof’
Petite: ‘And what’s that? Look it’s a duck. Can you see the duck in the water? What does the duck say?’
Tadpole: ‘cack cack’
Petite: ‘Ooh look at those joggers. That one’s got very nice brown legs hasn’t he? And look at those sexy little shorts. They don’t leave much to the imagination do they?’
Tadpole ‘?!?’
As you can see, I take the Tadpole’s education very seriously.
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petite anglaise 
hahaha… little girls’ educations must begin at a very early age… good for you….did he have a nice bum?
Comment by vitriolica — October 18, 2004 @ 12:46 pm
7/10
My favourite day is Wednesday. The firemen park up their big fire engine at the park entrance and all go jogging.
mmmmm…
Comment by petite — October 18, 2004 @ 1:18 pm
Do you find yourself saying things twice to the Tadpole and ending each senetnce or phrase with a little rise in pitch ?
“Where’s teddy?”
“Where’s teddy?”
“It’s a red elephant”
“It’s a red elephant”
“Who’s cheeky?”
“Who’s cheeky?”
“Phwoar!”
“Phwoar!”
Comment by backroads — October 18, 2004 @ 5:35 pm
This place is getting more and more like a knocking shop every day.
It’s why I pop by. Keep up the good work.
Comment by Watski — October 18, 2004 @ 8:00 pm
:shock: You have FIREMEN jogging in your park on Wednesdays??!! Tell me which one it is,please- I’ve never seen them in Parc Monceau!
Comment by Suziboo — October 20, 2004 @ 1:22 pm
Buttes Chaumont. Around 9.30am. At the main entrance near the mairie. Unmissable.
Comment by petite — October 20, 2004 @ 1:25 pm
I’m there. Maybe you’ll spot me, petite- i’ll be the one wearing lots of make-up, a very short skirt (who cares if it’s October, this is the POMPIERS we’re talking about)and dragging around two protesting under-threes. Maybe I could have a “malaise” and they could, ahem, “rescue” me? Phew, it’s hot in here all of a sudden…
Comment by Suziboo — October 20, 2004 @ 1:47 pm